Weekly Lesson #4
Introduction
You’ll never find peace if you’re always searching for it.
Most people chase peace by trying to control their environment, hoping circumstances will line up just right—but life rarely cooperates.
In this post, we’ll explore my interpretation of a hauntingly beautiful quote from The Solace of Open Spaces—and how it flips our entire idea of peace. You’ll learn why letting go of the need for external peace might be the key to finding real inner peace—and how to actually apply that idea.
The Lesson
“Peace Can Be Found Within, Not Outside Yourself”
ZBLessons #4
I was watching Yellowstone recently (great series, by the way) and in one scene, the characters were talking about The Solace of Open Spaces by Gretel Ehrlich. One quote in particular stuck with them—and then stuck with me:
“True solace is to find none. Which is to say, it’s everywhere.”
At first, it sounded like a contradiction. But the more I sat with it, the more I realised its depth.
To me, what Ehrlich is saying here is simple but powerful: peace isn’t something you find by chasing the perfect conditions for it—because life rarely provides them. Instead, peace is something you carry within you (in any circumstance). Once you realize this, you can find it everywhere.
Life is intrinsically tied to suffering. The Buddhists state this plainly in one of their core teachings: life is suffering. That’s not pessimism—it’s realism. Everyone experiences pain, disappointment, loss, and eventually death. This is the fundamental truth of existence.
Because suffering is inevitable, life frequently creates situations that seem to offer no peace at all. But Ehrlich has a solution:
Instead of searching externally for ideal conditions, become someone capable of peace no matter the circumstances.
If you can become someone who deals calmly and confidently with life’s challenges, you no longer depend on your environment to feel peaceful. You have an internal strength, an inner peace that you carry into any situation—even the difficult ones.
From what I can tell, that’s the heart of Ehrlich’s message:
True peace isn’t found in perfect conditions. It’s about building strength within yourself so you can find it in any conditions.
That’s where true solace exists:
• Not in a future where life finally feels right, but right here, right now, in all its imperfection.
• Not by eliminating chaos, but by no longer needing its absence to feel okay.
• Not by fixing everything, but by believing in your ability to handle whatever comes your way.
Once you accept that life rarely provides the perfect conditions for peace, you become more aware of the small things that can bring peace, even when it’s in an imperfect moment.
You begin noticing the subtle details you previously overlooked:
• The softness of a quiet morning.
• A friend checking in.
• Laughter during a tough week.
• The refreshing feeling of fresh air after a long day.
I always think about a perfect portrayal of this mindset that appears in the opening scene from the film Gladiator. The protagonist (Maximus) faces a moment of intense suffering and uncertainty. Yet, amidst the chaos of imminent battle, he finds solace. He recalls walking through peaceful fields at home, his children’s laughter echoing in the distance. He notices a bird calmly perched nearby, appreciating the subtle beauty of life even as war looms.
(timestamp: 50 seconds)
How to Apply This Lesson
When life’s circumstances aren’t aligning and peaceful moments seem elusive, the most practical way to find peace is to consciously accept and embrace the discomfort you’re experiencing. Rather than relying on external conditions, peace comes from acknowledging and trusting in your strength to endure whatever you’re facing.
Instead of resisting or worrying about your pain—which only adds anxiety to the suffering—shift your focus toward acceptance. Acceptance transforms your experience from “pain plus stress” into “pain plus peace.” You still feel discomfort, but you’re no longer overwhelmed by it because you’ve chosen courage over anxiety. Instead of wishing the discomfort away, you acknowledge it, and you’re okay with it. This creates a unique, resilient form of peace.
This is a different kind of peace.
I experience this often during challenging runs. It’s not the tranquil peace of sitting quietly beneath a tree—but there’s a different kind of solace that comes from fully embracing struggle. In this mindset, peace emerges because I trust my resilience. I know I can handle the discomfort, so I don’t need to stress or fight against it.
When I genuinely accept the difficulty of the run, my attention naturally shifts from wishing the pain away to noticing comforting details around me—a beautiful view, pleasant thoughts, or the warmth of sunlight on my face. Even in moments of minimal comfort, there is solace in knowing I’m strong enough to carry on.
This realization helps me recognize that peace can coexist with discomfort.
Dr. Martha Beck captures this acceptance mindset on the Huberman Lab Podcast when she discusses “How to move through suffering” –
Conclusion
The secret to true solace isn’t about finding the perfect place, moment, or circumstance. It’s about realizing that peace doesn’t need ideal conditions to exist—because it already exists within you.
When you embrace this powerful idea from Ehrlich, you stop waiting for external peace and start cultivating a lasting, resilient inner peace. You’ll still encounter suffering and difficulty, but your relationship with these experiences will fundamentally shift. Rather than feeling powerless in the face of discomfort, you’ll feel secure in your ability to handle whatever comes your way.
This is the true solace Ehrlich speaks of:
The peace found not by escaping life’s imperfections, but by fully embracing them.
Because when you know peace isn’t something you have to chase—
You discover it’s been with you all along.
